There was a time when I didn't believe there was a God. That this life was it. When I died that's the end of me. I was bothered by how pointless life was. I was spinning my wheels. I was doing something but not really going anywhere. I built relationships with people and gained friends but some friends took a different path in life and we lost contact. All we worked to build, slowly faded away to mere bittersweet memories.
I had relationships with family. Sure they're less likely to drift away completely, but even blood relation was no guarantee. Even the skills and abilities I learned in this life would be meaningless when I'm gone. I worked and made money but it felt empty to me. I felt there's not anything in life that really lasts. It all can be snuff out like a candle... Or burned down... It all is so fragile. Maybe you think I'm foolish as you read this... but that was how I saw life.
Eventually there came a point I realized there was a God and began to develop a relationship with him. It didn't radically change my life. I was a good guy before I knew God. I still worked my job that I didn't exactly love some days. I still had good times and bad times with people around me. I still had days that everything went wrong. One thing did change, and this one thing changed everything. My perspective on it all changed. I saw it in a new light.
No matter what changes, two things will last. Two things I have complete control of. My relationship to God, and whatever growth I gain in this life. Even if relationships don't pan out if it made me a better person then it wasn't pointless. Everything I go through is an opportunity to become better than I was when I woke up that morning. Anything that helps me develop to my full potential is not pointless. The best way to do that is to grow closer to God and act on that relationship. Maybe you've already learned this. Maybe you've always known this. The was a lesson I had to learn the hard way. Building that relationship with God is the point of this life. I'm not suggesting we all quit our jobs, and live like monks. We can work God into our everyday lives. For me scripture study and prayer helps build that relationship, but going out and acting on what I learn, letting it improve me, increases the trust and love I have for God. As that love and trust grows I learn and act more. The whole time I become a better person. It's a cycle that builds on itself, but it's also a cycle that requires constant effort to maintain. The moment I grow content and feel that I'm good enough I slowly slide back to what I used to be. Everyday I have to make that effort to be better. Everyday I have to remind myself of the point. To help God make me a better person.
Elder Robinson
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